Goodbye 2006

This morning we took our last hike out the access road for 2006. I'm having a bit of trouble with today. This is why I'm actually glad we're staying in tonight and celebrating quietly with a bottle of champagne, some snacks, a little Yahtzee and Ned. I know I'm supposed to be happy and looking forward to the New Year and a blank slate. But the thing about New Years Eve, is it's starting to become the night we continually make a toast and say "this is the year of making a baby". Again. and again. 2007 is the year I turn 37. I hate that. The age of 36 has come and gone, 4 IUI's and emotional exhaustion later and still no baby. And 36 is 'the year' everyone makes a big deal about. Plus I know that 2007 is going to be the year of fertility clinics, lots of emotional ups and downs, financial worry and baby worry. Woofriggin hoo. I should be excited, but its a bit more like dread. I could also be suffering post event disorder, everything is quiet after Christmas, so I'm being all dreary. Plus its cold and rainy now. So to get it in perspective, I'll do some lists:

Events from 2006:
4 failed IUIs
We lost April
But we gained Ned
I started Accupuncture
We had a great Christmas
we traveled a lot for our summer vacation
we spend a lot of time with friends
we spent a lot of time around our house and garden
we found out our friends are moving back to England
but we found out our friends in England are getting married this year in the states!
Dan started a new position
I seem to be getting more freelance gigs

Things to look forward to in 2007:
Ned gets nuetered - good for us, bad for him
We're supposed to go on a trip in March to Vegas or California, just the 2 of us
Starting working with a fertility clinic & getting pregnant
Maybe visiting our friends in England in spring/summer
A big wedding of our friends in the Fall
Another big year of gardening
Hopefully bookclub keeps going
Finding a new yoga instructor or organizing my own class

I have a feeling if I was in a happier mood, I'd have more good things to look forward do. Right now I'm kinda just looking forward to this evening being over. But also looking forward to probably getting good and drunk with my husband.


Oh, and I do have one New Year's Resolution: to cuss less.